Carrot, Egg & Tea: A New Twist on an Old Story
A young woman visits her mother complaining about how hard things have been for her. She doesn’t know how she is going to keep carrying on in life. She is so tired of fighting and struggling.
Her mother takes her into the kitchen and the daughter watches as she fills three pots with water. In the first pot, the mother places a carrot, in the second she places an egg, in the last she places loose tea leaves. She allows the water to sit on the stove and boil without saying a word. The daughter alternates between frustration and tears as she continues to share her stories about the fear, anxiety and stress she is feeling in her life. Twenty minutes pass and the mother shuts off the burners. She removes the carrot and places it on a plate and does the same with the egg. She ladles the tea into a clear cup and sets it beside the plates. She turns to her daughter, then asks, “Tell me what you see?”
“A carrot, an egg, and tea,” she replies.
The mother invites her to take a closer look. The young woman watches as her mother picks up the carrot and smashes it easily in her hand. Next the mother takes the egg and cracks it on the countertop. After pulling off the shell, her mother places the hard-boiled egg between her hands so the daughter can see how much it has hardened. Finally, the mother picks up the cup of tea and holds it up to the light. The daughter is stunned at how dark it has become and knows it must be very strong.
The daughter asks, “What is the point of all this Mother?”
Her mother explains that each of these objects faced the same challenge, but each reacts differently. The boiling water represents the stress and tension of being in difficult times. The carrot represents people with fear or victim mindsets and poor boundaries. They have forgotten who they are and feel incapable of trusting themselves, so soften to the point of losing their shape and blending into whatever is around them. The egg represents people with fixed mindsets who are so focused on surviving that they attempt to control everyone and everything around them. They become hardened because their life experiences haven’t taught them how to trust others, let alone themselves.
The loose tea leaves are unique. They represent the people who are balanced, who “hold on loosely” and have rest into all of their experiences, viewing them as opportunities to learn and grow. People who are like tea leaves know that if they remain flexible, trust in the process and allow themselves to be transformed, they will come away better and stronger than before.
As Paul Harvey used to say, “And now for the rest of the story…”:
The subtler message within this story is that in every situation there is an opportunity to mitigate challenges. The carrot, egg and tea leaves represent different levels of self-awareness. The awareness that the water is boiling and for how long, represents the act of bringing presence and self-awareness to the challenge and becoming more conscious. If aware, the carrot would be removed from the boiling water when it became tender not mushy. If aware, the egg would be removed after 3 minutes so it was soft but no longer fragile.
Bringing awareness to your life creates opportunities to bloom, no matter where you find yourself along your journey. When you acknowledge your gifts, curiously exploring rather than judging yourself, your life transforms. As you speak your emotions rather than bottling them up, create space for alone time, as well as create healthy boundaries, you become the best version of yourself and are able to hold space for others to be their best selves as well.
So, ditch the criticism, snap judgments, demands and passive aggressive behavior. Align with your core values and consciously choose your communication methods. As you become more aware, you gain clarity and wisdom, and surrender to trust. When you do, you experience freedom because you no longer are controlled by the emotions of fear that have kept you prisoner. Your choice to awaken or remain unconscious in life determines the level of stress and tension you experience during difficult times and transitions.
The Dalai Lama says, “Be the change you wish to see in the world”. In Becoming Aware your life and relationships are empowered, creating relationships that are balanced, supportive and healthy. ‘Be the change that you wish to see in the world’ and witness your world transform.
If you are interested in bringing more awareness to your life and relationships, create healthier boundaries and learn how to communicate more effectively in your work and personal life, click the link below to answer a few questions and book a complimentary time to speak with Teresa: https://forms.gle/B8gv1btpeuUP9GLv5
Together we will create a plan to reach your goals and in no time you will be experiencing better results with less effort and more joy!
About the author:
Teresa Lodato is the founder of Becoming Aware® Coaching. As a professionally certified coach with advanced certifications in NeuroTransformational coaching and Relational Trauma coaching, in addition to being a co-active trained coach, Teresa has the skills and passion for creating more awareness in the world.
As a former stressed-out financial services executive of a Fortune 500 firm, Teresa specializes in teaching stressed out adults and teens the skills needed to navigate challenging times and offers guidance along their journey of Becoming Aware®. Using cutting edge techniques and proven strategies based on neuroscience and psychology, her clients fully align with their inner knowing optimizing mental, emotional and physical well being while achieving extraordinary results. Teresa is an author and speaker in addition to being a highly sought-after coach for forward-thinking individuals and organizations. For more information about her and the transformational work she does, please visit: www.teresalodato.com
